Are you experiencing late potty training in your home? Is your child three, four, five or older and still not potty trained?

Few issues cause more worry to the parent of a preschooler or elementary aged child.

Let’s take a look at when to take action and when to relax.

– Medically speaking.

The first and smartest thing to do when faced with late potty training is get a medical evaluation. Talk to your pediatrician and make sure there is nothing medically holding your child back from toilet training.

For the majority of these children, there is not; late potty training is most often behaviorally based.

What does that mean? Usually that means there is a bright and creative preschooler who has totally figured out how to NOT be potty trained.

Pretty smart, huh.

He just needs some guidance in turning around that potential and using it to his advantage instead of to his disadvantage. Here are a couple of areas that you can address today to evaluate your late blooming child.

– Readiness counts.

Do make sure your child is physically and emotionally ready to be potty trained. Almost all children are by the age of three, but there are some late bloomers and a quick assessment of potty training readiness cues will tell you where your child falls on this spectrum.

– She won’t listen to you.

You say use the potty chair, she uses her pants.

You say be a big girl, she begs to go back in diapers.

Sound familiar?

This is a power struggle. The way out of a power struggle is to stop participating in it.

If you’ve been potty training for awhile, then your child knows what to do. There is simply no good reason (in her mind) to do it.

It’s time to put the ball back in her court by saying something like the following.

“These are special new undies I got just for you. You are a smart girl and I know you’ll do a good job keeping these undies clean and dry. Let me know if you need any help.”

Generally, at this point, less words are better. Smart kids are often excellent talkers and will keep you off center through the use of conversation.

Don’t play that game. Make sure he knows there are reasonable rewards (something he really wants) available to him once he is actively taking charge of being potty trained. Have him plot his progress using a potty chart of some sort.

Help him when he needs it – cleaning up accidents, for example – but have him do as much as possible for himself.

At this point, relax. Your child will handle it from here. Your job is to be the support person; encouraging and helping, but totally out of the way.

Warning: some potty-ers will get the message right away and train quickly at this point. Some, like one of mine, will get very resistant.

Hold your ground. Cheerfully and nonchalantly. “I’m sorry you can’t play with your little friend today, but that is a treat we agreed you’d get when you are staying clean and dry. I’m sure you’ll do better next time.”

This is when my child would throw a fit. And when she would get sent to her room to calm down. This often took a long time.

But take heart. I’m happy to report that my daughter is potty trained.

Hang in there. Mom or Dad. Late potty training needn’t derail you. You can do this. Toilet training is only the first of many times you’ll need to guide your child through some challenging places.

That’s what parenting is often all about.

Author Bio: Colleen Langenfeld has potty trained four kids and helps other moms get more out of their mothering at http://www.paintedgold.com . Toilet train faster using her potty reward charts and creative ideas plus uncover more about late potty training by visiting her website today.

Category: Parenting
Keywords: late potty training,late potty,potty training,toilet training