Eventually, the day will come when you need to bring a new baby home. You will most likely feel a conflict of interest, unsure as to whether you should fuss over your new baby or your first born child.

Generally, it is at this moment that sharing will begin. If at all possible, make an arrangement for an adult to hold your baby as you begin to give older children one-on-one time with you. If any of your older children seem to be interested with your new baby, assist him in having a closer look. Give them an opportunity of comparing his own size with the ‘small’ size of the newcomer. As you do this, try to mention what happened during your older child’s homecoming. You should however not be surprised if any of your older children are not interested with your new child. He may be no more interested with this addition to your family than being with a new dining-room table. This would be especially true if your newborn child is sleeping during his homecoming. As a result of this, he may not appeal to the older child. If you are going to bring your new born child home, try also to present your older child with a gift along with his new brother or sister. This gift may include a toy or a new tricycle

You should try all your best not to push your older child to bond instantly with your new born baby.
If any of the older children show no interest for now, give them a chance to get involved in other things. However try to be careful not to come up with a list of rules and regulations regarding your arrival, such as trying to insist that an older child stay far or remain quiet from the new baby. Even though you definitely need to protect the new baby, you want to try and avoid giving an older child the message that this new baby may have more importance than he has.

Instead of cramming the introduction of a new baby into a short space of time, be contented with the idea that over the next few weeks and months, an older child will eventually come to know his new brother or sister and will also get used to their presence. When children have strong feelings about an upcoming birth your, they may have a desire to have a brother or sister of the same sex. Your older child’s preference does not signal the future relationship that will occur with your children.

When you are talking about your new child, be matter of fact, saying that some babies are girls while some are boys. Let your older child know that you acknowledge their preference and that it’s alright to want a brother sometimes more than a sister. Give your child a chance to come up with a list of advantages of having either a brother or a sister, and help her get rid of any stereotyping that she may have. For example, let her know that any child of any sex will just be as likely to look up to him or her. If by any means she thinks that boys may not be as much fun as girls, help her think of all the friendships that she currently enjoys with boys. However, do not get over involved with trying to convince him or her that she will enjoy having a brother or a sister. It just takes time for an older child to get adjusted.

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Category: Parenting
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