When I write about the 12 Step Program, it brings many memories to mind. But the first thing that comes to mind is the first paragraph of Chapter 5 \”How It Works.\” You will recall that is the paragraph that talks about rigorous honesty. I believe individuals are incredibly gifted at self deception. In the program they simply call that denial. But I think it has more to it than that. I can continue in my self-deception as long as I am willing to continue in the same patterns of behavior.

If you have ever dug into the history of Alcoholics Anonymous and have been so fortunate to have read some of the talks given by Dr. Bob, you will know that he often referred to the \”four absolutes\” which are; absolute honesty, absolute unselfishness, absolute purity, and absolute love. These he said were the standards or measures by which we should judge our own behavior. Accordingly, any of us who look at ourselves by these measures should realize just how far we have to go in our self-development. First we must accept a set of standards for our lives. This is a personal decision that requires a searching and fearless moral inventory. If you go to Webster\’s Dictionary and look up \”moral,\” you will find this definition: \”of or relating to principles of right and wrong.\” Listed also are the synonyms; virtuous, righteous, noble, ethical, and principled. Do I have a set of standards for my life? It is impossible to do any moral inventory without a standard of measure. So the first requirement is that I define what are the measures that I apply to my life and to my behavior?

The danger with misuse of spirituality in the 12 Step Program is that our spirituality becomes so subjective it becomes meaningless. Our culture and the addiction are so focused on what feels good instead of what is right. We often remind patients that if they do the right thing, the good feeling will follow. If we confuse our spirituality with what feels good instead of what\’s right, we have put our emphasis in the wrong place. The base word for religion in Latin means \”to bind.\” If an individual does not \”bind himself/herself \” to these steps, recovery is impossible.

The inventory that individuals struggle with in their program, is simply the tip of the iceberg. Everyone knows that the vast majority of the iceberg is located under the surface, as is true with our individual character. We are not what we seem to be on the surface. So that first attempt at self-honesty which one is challenged with, is just the beginning of what \”in theory\” should be a new life. Yet how many really approach it that way?

The answer to that lies within the individual. The twelve step recovery program is the vehicle which we use in drug and alcohol treatment, and therefore should be the same method practiced by the staff. After all, we are the ones the patients first see and we espouse this approach to living. How well do we see that rigorous honesty being practiced in us? See, this personal inventory stuff, if done correctly gets pretty painful from the get go. Even after years of abstinence. So the first moral inventory usually is pretty superficial. But it is a beginning.

The next part, requires one to be willing to admit to God to ourselves and another person the exact nature of our wrongs. It has been my experience that we tend to put our attention on the \”other person.\” When we do that the self-deception has raised its head again because I am taking the focus off of me and put it on another. There is a song which begins with this line, \”Let there be peace on earth, and let it begin with me.\” In order for me to be at peace with myself, I must do the things I respect. The self-deception must become my enemy and I must confront him/me daily. I have found great comfort and also accountability through the help of others. That makes the group so important, because others can give me feedback on my behaviors. In other words they can help me see me.

The AA/NA groups, when at their best, are the perfect place for this to happen. As I confront me and receive encouragement and reinforcement from others, I practice my new approach to assessing my life. I find new satisfaction because I am living in a different way. Others see it too. I find I am enjoying this new approach, I even begin to look forward to my participation.

When we become entirely ready to have God remove our defects of character this is just part of the process. After I have determined what character defects are controlling my behaviors, I have to be willing to have God remove them; especially the ones I enjoy and that serve me. Remember I am the problem.

So in the process I learn to work on me and leave the fault finding to God. After all, He is the most qualified teacher and I must be the humble student. \”God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.\”

Learn more at www.valleyhope.org or
www.valleyhope.org/drug-rehab-alcohol-rehab-aboutus.aspx.

Learn more at http://www.valleyhope.org or
http://www.valleyhope.org/drug-rehab-alcohol-rehab-aboutus.aspx

Author Bio: Learn more at www.valleyhope.org or
www.valleyhope.org/drug-rehab-alcohol-rehab-aboutus.aspx.

Category: Wellness, Fitness and Diet
Keywords: drug and alcohol treatment centers, alcohol rehab, drug rehab, 12 Step Program, Serenity to Change