Recognising Your Own Anxieties Can Solve Your Children’s Too
Some parents are aware their child has anxiety problems and some aren’t. One of the reasons some parents don’t spot it is that they are unable to recognise it in themselves. Anxious parents can pass on their anxieties to their children – if you’re unsure of something or fearful of a situation you can guarantee that your child will detect it no matter how young they are.
In 2008 a study by the University of Rochester found that sickness levels were higher in children with anxious or depressed parents. The link between stress and illness is not a new one but this study was the first to provide evidence of parental stress being transferred to their offspring as the children in the study showed raised levels of immune cells in their blood.
Also in 2008 UCLA psychology professor Michelle Craske completed a study of 65 7-12 year olds, published in the journal Behaviour Research and Therapy. Some were anxious, some weren’t but had anxious parents, and in some cases, neither the children nor the parents were anxious (Craske said this third group was surprisingly hard to find). She found that children with anxious parents are about 3.5 times more at risk for anxiety than those whose parents were not.
Should you as a parent be concerned? Yes and no seems to be the answer from Dr David Jessop of Bristol University in the UK who said that “I believe that children are highly resilient, and their systems are sufficiently robust to cope with this. The 64,000 dollar question is, once this stress is alleviated, do the children’s immune systems return to normal, or are they scarred for life?
Every family and parent goes through stressful times and we all experience anxiety when confronted with unpleasant life events such as divorce, death and redundancy to name but a few. But how well parents cope with everyday life can mean consistently elevated levels of stress within the home and impact the long term health of your child.
So how well do you cope with everyday life? Do you have regular periods of any of the following?
– increased blood pressure
– heart palpitations
– aches and pains that come and go
– headaches
– increased anxiety, knots in your stomach a churning feeling
– feeling low
– short temper
– forgetfulness
– smoking more than usual
– drinking more than usual
– sudden tiredness
– poor work performance
– difficulty sleeping
If you answered yes, you may feel you’re managing well but managing isn’t dealing with the cause and the physiological effects that stress has on your body. If the answer is yes, regardless of the reason, there are many techniques and help services available that you can use to deal with situations when you feel you’re only coping and not dealing with stress. Firstly, don’t be afraid to ask for help and advice – there isn’t anybody who hasn’t been in the same situation or felt the way that you feel.
Some ways to get help:
– Look online – there are many stress help groups and sites
– Confide in a friend or understanding relative
– Speak to your GP
– Join a local or online group for support in areas of your life that you find stressful such as: parenting, bereavement
– Visit a counsellor if you would rather have someone independent to talk to
Most importantly of all, if you find yourself always having to cope with stress and not eliminating it then take action to resolve situations, don’t just hope everything will all turn out okay in the end. You feel all the better for it, your health will improve and according to the research above so will the health of your children.
Author Bio: Ali Spencer researches and studies anxiety and related problem behaviours in children such as OCD, agoraphobia and hyperactivity. She specialises in the root causes and preventative methods to help parents and children develop a Stress Less way of living. Helping parents to enjoy their children and enjoy life.
Category: Parenting
Keywords: panic attacks, children, anxiety