Unless you’ve been living on the moon, you probably know by now that the passive voice may not be your first choice in writing a sentence. Sometimes, however, the passive voice is the right choice.

But, the passive voice is easier to use or to avoid than it is to explain. Consider this statement, from “Words into Type:” “The active voice asserts that the person or thing represented by the subject of the sentence does something; the passive asserts that the subject is acted upon.” Got that? It’s the kind of sentence that needs re-reading a couple of times.

As with any technical matter, including grammar, technical writing can be difficult to understand, even when it’s well done. But I think it’s possible to have some fun exploring the passive voice and when it works, or doesn’t.

First of all, your goal as a writer is clarity, right? Whether your writing is about installing a refrigerator, climbing a mountain, or defining nightmares, if you aren’t clear your reader can’t learn from you. (That’s Writer’s Goal #1.)

Your second goal, close behind the first, is to keep your reader engaged. (Writer’s Goal #2). Knowing the difference between the passive and the active voice, and how to make good use of them both, will help you meet both of these goals.

What is the active voice?

When the person doing the acting is at the start of the sentence, and before the verb, you have the active voice. For example:

My dad made omelettes every Sunday morning.

All three boys smoked the cigarette.

The treasurer released the financials.

What Is the Passive Voice?

The passive voice turns things around so that the emphasis is on the person (or thing) receiving an action. For example:

Omelettes were made every Sunday morning by my dad.

The cigarette was smoked by all three boys.

The financials were released by the treasurer.

In all three sentences, the person doing the action comes at the very end, and the person-or thing-that’s being changed or moved around is at the very beginning.

Here are some slightly different examples of the passive voice:

The operating room was cleaned up immediately.

The surgeon was notified of her next patient’s arrival.

The night supervisor was seen as hard-working.

Notice what’s different about these examples? Right! We don’t know who did the cleaning, or notifying, or considering. But, does it matter? Not really, as long as we know that the room was cleaned up, or the surgeon notified about her next patient.

Why and when to avoid, or use, the passive voice?

For one thing, the passive voice calls for more words, where less will do. In this way it violates Writer’s Goal #1, clarity, by cluttering up the sentence.

For another, the passive voice, at least in our examples, violates Writer’s Goal #2, by keeping us at a distance from the action, and therefore not as engaged. Tommy kissed Gracia is so direct! Tommy the kisser, the action he takes, and Gracia’s cheek (or mouth), are all we need. Where did all the energy go in “Gracia was kissed by Tommy.”? Tommy is pulled apart from his action, and the energy drains out.

In the second set of examples, the passive voice may actually work better in complying with Writer’s Goals #1 and #2, because it helps us avoid extra words, such as who actually cleaned up the operating room. In other words, when the person or thing receiving the action is most important, the passive voice can be useful. Here are a couple more examples of the passive voice being helpful:

The corpse was spotted shortly after midnight.

Three new oil slicks were reported this morning.

The trash cans were usually put out by 8 a.m.

Practice makes perfect with exercises

I don’t usually include exercises in my articles, but I think the struggle to learn about active vs. passive voice can be won with practice. (Notice the passive voice here? What do you think? Does it work?)

See my suggested rewrites at the close of the article.

Exercise #1:The Neighborhood Clinic has been awarded the Red Cross Service Prize by the Smith Foundation.

Exercise #2: Financial disaster was avoided by the Greenway Clinic when its director of accounting was replaced promptly.

Exercise #3: When the museum’s basement is flooded by Henry’s Creek, pumps are turned on and most of the damage is contained by quick action.

Exercise #4: The IPO was postponed several times for a variety of reasons. In the end, the founder was gently edged upstairs by the board’s chairman and the stock offering went ahead soon after.

Suggested rewrites: (Please note that these aren’t the only possible solutions to the active/passive voice conundrum. You may have your own preferred solutions.)

Exercise #1:The foundation awarded the prize to the clinic.

Even better: The Neighborhood Clinic earned (not received) the Red Cross Service Prize. The clinic becomes the subject of the sentence, and appears a lively actor in its community.

Exercise #2: The Greenway Clinic avoided financial disaster by replacing its director of accounting promptly.

Exercise #3: When Henry’s Creek floods the museum’s basement, staff quickly turn the pumps on and contain most of the damage.

Exercise #4: The IPO was postponed several times for a variety of reasons. In the end, the board’s chairman gently edged the founder upstairs and the stock offering went ahead soon after.

Copyright (c) 2010 Jane Sherwin. You may reprint this entire article and you must include the copyright info and the following statement: “Jane Sherwin is a writer who helps hospitals and other healthcare facilities communicate their strengths and connect with their readers.”

Author Bio: Learn more about Jane at http://worddrivecommunications.com/index.htm. Subscribe to Jane’s free monthly e-newsletter at http://tinyurl.com/2enrdqx for practical tips on communicating effectively with customers, clients, employees and the public.

Category: Writing
Keywords: guidelines for passive voice; passive voice; how to use the passive voice;what is the passive voice