Six Questions That You Can Use to Stump Your Smug Doctor

You do not have to have a medical degree or even a CPR certification to appreciate some of the weird and unusual medical terms that I doubt most doctors even remember from school, but it helps. If you have ever been the victim of the blank expression that tells your doctor they just said something that is way over your head, now is the time to turn the tables and try to catch them off guard. Of course, that is providing you can work some of these wild words into a conversation.

– Abbozzo: The next time the doctor holds up an x-ray of you and explains something he sees in outrageous words, ask him if he could make an abbozzo of it for you to take home and study. Who knows, he might surprise you. It means to make a sketch of it for you.

– Abradant: Use this the next time the doctor discusses how your arthritis is faring. When he or she is finished explaining to you what arthritis is for the one hundredth time, (Why do they feel the need to do that?) just say that you understand the word \”abradant\” and why did he or she not just say that in the first place? Abradant is a substance that abrades, like two bones rubbing together.

– Linguatulidae: This is a great word to use when your family physician refers to your flu-like symptoms as a bug for the twelfth time. All you have to do is look shocked and say, \”You mean I have linguatulidae?\” They are worm like arthropods that live in human viscera, if you are unlucky enough to catch them.

– Stercoblin: If you just want to have fun with your poor family physician, ask him why your stool is stercoblin. That is one way to get that blank expression on his or her face for a change. If they actually know that it is the pigmentation that makes stool and urine the color they are, you are lucky to have such a smart doctor.

– Xanthous: if you are a blonde or red head, ask your doctor why you are feeling so xanthous. It’s the word for yellow or red hair. If he or she scratches their head and asks if it is because you have been depressed, it might be time to change doctors.

– Nasutiform: This is the real tell of whether your doctor was awake in class when they taught medical terms. Tell you MD that you have this nasutiform on your face and you are worried about it running. If they ask you to show it to them, tell them it is as plain as the nose on your face.

It\’s Your Money

Of course, it is not wise to pick on the person who is the only one you know with more than a CPR certification, especially if you have a bum ticker, but hey… you have to hope that your family physician has a sense of humor. You pay him or her enough of your hard earned cash to expect one, at the very least.

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Category: Wellness, Fitness and Diet
Keywords: MD,family physician,medical terms ,CPR certification ,Smug Doctor,website,HIPAA Compliance

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