What most spouses fail to appreciate is the enormous power they can yield to influence and guide the course of their marriage and happiness.

Marriages seldom stay static. That means that a secure marriage isn\’t one where things will always remain the same. A happy marriage is one in which you never stop putting in an effort to make it better.

At some time in their lives most couples get disillusioned by their marriage. They feel their marriage has failed to live up to their expectations. If things have not worked out the way you imagined, why blame your partner? You are responsible for your own happiness, so why not bring a change at how you look at things around you. Examine your own expectations and discover if they were unrealistic or misplaced, in the first place.

Go back and remember the things that once made the marriage great. Surely, there was some point when the love burned hot. Seek out old pictures, music or just plain memories and relish those moments. Think about why you loved your partner then. and why those feelings have changed.

Remember that a marriage either grows or weakens. When you don\’t put effort into your relationship, love dies. Your partner can sense when you are disappointed in him or her, even if you try to hide it.

If you\’re going to restore, heal, and strengthen your marriage, you have to think clearly about the reasons your marriage isn\’t satisfying both you and your partner.

Surveys have shown that unhappy periods in a marriage are not indicative of future unhappiness. In fact, one study showed that a majority of married couples who considered themselves unhappy, but stayed on with their marriage, were happy five years later. Clearly, you don\’t have to be blissfully in love or very happy for your relationship to last.

You must respect your partner. In some ways, respect for your partner is even more important than love for your partner. Have you ever noticed how you find it easy to like people who look up to you? When you respect and admire your partner, your partner will feel more loving feelings towards you. If your partner feels as if he or she has to live up to your expectations, constantly disappoints you, or can never get it right, you\’ve failed to show your partner the respect that he or she deserves.

Only you can avoid divorce and save your marriage by taking responsibility for your relationship with your spouse. You cannot evade responsibility for marital conflict–even if think that the problem lies elsewhere. Realize that your actions may have influenced the changes in your marriage. Many couples often drift from each other due to hectic work or social schedules, and over time, the marriage relationship is neglected.

When the bond that holds the marriage together weaken, frustration will lead to heated arguments and thoughts of divorce may escalate. Divorce may seem a likely solution to your unhappy marriage; however studies show that saving your marriage is well worth the effort. You have the power to transform your marriage, even if your partner doesn\’t want to.

A happy, fulfilling relationship begins with you.

Author Bio: RPBhalla writes extensively on Finance, Health and Relationship issues. http://marriage-saving-tips.info http://makingup-your-marriage Info

Category: Relationships
Keywords: marriage breakup,stop your divorce,making up,save my marriage