Have you noticed that you have less patience than you used to? Are you less willing to stand in line? Do you have a shorter fuse with your co-workers, your spouse, or your kids? Do you find yourself less tolerant of sifting through your email? How about that slow driver in front of you? Have you “had it up to here” with politics on the other side of the aisle?

Maybe you keep your impatience inside, rather than expressing it. Yet, that only serves like a cap on a soda bottle that’s constantly shaken up-you’re going to explode when you take that cap off.

Hopefully, that’s a little more dramatic than you feel, but maybe not. I’ve witnessed an epidemic of impatience these days. From road rage to nasty emails to irate customers, it seems that we’re losing our patience and, with it, our civility.

What can we do about that?

The key I’ve discovered is to understand that “the way I’m looking at things” is the real culprit. It’s the way we look at something that causes impatience, not the event itself. You can prove this to yourself by noting that sometimes you have great patience for something and, at other times, you have little patience for the same circumstances. It’s all about what is going inside you at the moment-or how you are looking at things-your perception.

Therefore, if you can then shift your perception, you can discover a new way of relating to what is happening-and possibly one that is filled with more understanding, compassion, enjoyment, and patience.

So what is the perceptual habit that creates impatience?

Consider the idea that impatience comes when you judge “what is happening” by an imaginary ideal of what “should be” happening. For example, you think traffic “should be” moving faster. You think that another person “should be” considering your point of view. You think that you “should be” farther along in your healing or in your progress with some task. You think that. . . You get the idea.

We judge “what is” happening by what we think “should be” happening and get impatient with what’s going on.

The next step is to realize that, actually, “what is happening” is what “should be” happening given current conditions. In other words, notice cause and effect. For example, if it’s rush hour, there actually should be a lot of traffic. A lot of people are going to and from work at this time.

If you aren’t progressing in a task, have you really been doing what you need to do to move it along? If another person isn’t considering your point of view, have you been considering theirs? Engage in a little observation of what is actually happening and recognize possible causes and effects. When you notice why things are the way they are, you may notice your impatience lessening or dissolving altogether.

Try this out the next time you feel impatient and see if it works for you. Ask yourself two questions: “What do I think ‘should be’ happening right now?” and “What is causing things to be the way they are?” See if asking those two questions shifts your perspective in a way that releases your impatience.

Of course, doing this takes some effort to step back from how you are looking at things and some skill at observing yourself and others. These are skills that you can develop. Meditation is one great way to do develop those inner skills. Check out the Resource Box below for more information on the best meditation methods.

Are you ready to quiet your mind, relax deeply, and rediscover your patience? Discover how to take your practice to the next level. For amazing meditation cds, information, tips and techniques, be sure to visit us here:

Kevin Schoeninger, M.A. Philosophy, Meditation Instructor

Are you ready to quiet your mind, relax deeply, and rediscover your patience? For amazing meditation CDs, information, tips, and techniques, visit us here:
http://www.mindbodytrainingcompany.com/meditation/guided-meditation-cd/
Kevin Schoeninger, M.A. Philosophy, Meditation Instructor

Author Bio: Are you ready to quiet your mind, relax deeply, and rediscover your patience? Discover how to take your practice to the next level. For amazing meditation cds, information, tips and techniques, be sure to visit us here:

Kevin Schoeninger, M.A. Philosophy, Meditation Instructor

Category: Self Help
Keywords: impatience, reduce stress, stress management, how to be more patient, how to relax, meditation