Top 10 Mistakes People Make That Can Destroy a Marriage
It is natural to make mistakes but there are some mistakes that can destroy your marriage. Here are the top 10 mistakes that people make and why you should avoid them.
1. Not having enough sex.
This might not seem to be such an issue for some people but the fact is that sexual intercourse creates an intimacy that you cannot get outside of marriage. It brings the couple together on a deeper level as both partners express their vulnerability to each other. Without sexual intercourse, you increase the distance between you as well as create an excuse for having an affair.
2. Saying ‘I told you so.’
No one wants to hear ‘I told you so.’ No matter what it is that you were right about, saying this statement makes your partner feel inadequate and puts them in a very defensive mode. It is the equivalent of an insult in disguise. Instead, greet them with a warm smile when they admit that they were wrong and let them know that it is okay for them to make mistakes around you.
3. Dishonesty.
This one is self explanatory but still many people tell small lies out of habit. Try to keep them out of your marriage. If you went somewhere during work hours and you tell your spouse that you were at work all day, you can create a sense of distrust if any evidence shows up proving otherwise. It doesn’t mean that you are doing something wrong but small lies can make the other person feel that you don’t want them in all aspects of your life and these feelings can fester into distrust.
4. Smart or sarcastic remarks.
Sarcasm can hurt, especially in an argument or discussion. Usually someone makes sarcastic remarks in this situation as a defense mechanism when they don’t really want to have to talk about the issue and push all of the blame on the other person without accepting the responsibility of actually having blamed them. AVOID this! When you argue, consciously keep sarcastic remarks out of the conversation.
5. Lack of respect.
Respect can mean a lot of things to different people but ultimately it comes down to how well you treat your partner. If you respect your partner, you would value their opinions; consider their thoughts and feelings before making important decisions that affect both of you and even how you treat them during intercourse. If you don’t treat your partner with respect, they will likely grow to resent you and there will be distance between both of you.
6. Distance.
There are many things people do that create distance between them. Letting an argument get in the way of making up, cheating, putting friends and family first instead of your spouse, not helping with the kids and the list goes on. You need to be able to recognize when you feel disconnected from your partner and make an effort to bring yourselves closer.
7. Not saying ‘thank you.’
Let’s face it, our spouses do a lot for us on a day to day basis even if it just going to work and coming home on time. People need to feel appreciated and recognized for the things that they do for others. Thank your partner as often as you can when you recognize that they are doing something for you. If they bring you a glass of water to take your pills, say ‘thank you.’ Anything at all. You will be surprised at how much they actually do for you and the more you thank them the more they will be happy to help you with anything.
8. Apologizing but not changing bad habits.
This one is pretty common and one of the more destructive mistakes you can make. When you and your partner recognize that a mistake has been made and you talk about it, don’t simply concede and apologize if you have no intention of correcting the behavior. It hurts a lot when you apologize and then continue to do the same thing over and over again because it seems futile to even mention it in the first place.
9. Badmouthing your partner.
It’s always good to have someone to talk to about your troubles, but it is a little more complicated when you are ranting about your spouse. Make sure you are talking to one person and that you can trust them. What you are trying to avoid is bad talking your partner behind their back and marring their reputation with friends and family. Not only is this bad for them but when you have a serious problem that you need a genuine and unbiased opinion on, your friends won’t be able to give you that because they will think the worst of your spouse.
10. Being presumptuous.
This is simply the way you think about what your spouse tells you. For instance, your partner says ‘I will be late today’ and you immediately think ‘he’s cheating on me.’ Jumping to conclusions is something you want to avoid desperately because it is baseless negativity that can destroy your marriage over nothing.
Author Bio: If you need help learning how to avoid these mistakes and improve your marriage so you can have the happiness you deserve, Click Here.
Category: Relationships
Keywords: fix my marriage,broken marriage,marriage mistakes,bad marriage,get out of a bad marriage