The divorce rate in the United States is over 50%. This is largely due to people not noticing the warnings or the “Red Flags” in their significant other before and during the marriage. This article will depict many “Red Flags” that many people overlook or ignore. The purpose of this article is to make you aware of many warnings so that you can adjust and hopefully prevent your relationship from going bad.

Some of the marriage warnings are there from start, yet we either do not see them, or prefer not to see them. You really should be paying attention to these warnings! You think that you are going to make him/her change over time and that things are going to be perfect! The truth is that, most of the time, it is very difficult to change somebody, unless he/she is willing to change.

The truth is that most factors/defects get multiplied over time, over the course of a marriage. What might seem like a small thing to you in the beginning of your marriage might appear horrendous a few years later. So bear that in mind, and look for those flags from the beginning to make sure that you do not embark on the marriage journey, which is of the most challenging journeys in our lives, without having examined the warnings.

One of the flags is, for instance, if you see that your spouse behaves somewhat selfishly. In the beginning, when you are in love, you may not be paying so much attention to that thinking that this is a “small thing” and that it is not that important!

One example of selfishness is that if he or she finishes some of your favorite food before you come home from work or school! Your spouse should be thinking of you, and of the fact that you will come back home possibly tired and hungry. If she or he went ahead and finished the food, that is a sign of selfishness. This is the type of behavior that gets much worse over the years, and then you realize that the flags were there, but you just did not see them!

Another example of selfishness is if your spouse has a different schedule from yours, and does not pay attention to your schedule. What I mean by that is if your spouse does not have to get up early in the morning, whereas you do, but he or she does not care about the fact that you have to go to bed relatively early in order to wake up early, and she or he decides to go to bed late and turns up the TV while you are trying to get some sleep!

This is total lack of empathy, and shows serious signs of selfishness. Your spouse and you should be coordinating your schedules so that they fit both of your needs. Now, this does not mean that your spouse cannot watch TV while you are in bed. He or she may watch as long as the TV is not too loud. In fact, this shows that your spouse cares about you and about your health/schedule!

The gist of selfishness is when you feel that your wife/husband is taking a lot and not giving much in return. For example, if he or she is not helping as much as you do around the house, or in driving, etc…

Keep an eye on all those things that might seem trivial now. These are the warnings, or the flags, that you should be paying attention to from the beginning. If you see any of these, make sure to be very careful as this is a “red flag”.

The most important lesson here is to try to find out whether your husband/wife is as devoted as you are. This is really critical to know before making the decision of having kids. Once you have kids, your life will change forever, so make sure that you are starting on the right foot.

Another “red flag” is if you see or sense, from the start, that your boyfriend/girlfriend is interested in the money you are making, or potentially the money you are going to make. This indicates that your mate is greedy. This will eventually lead to serious problems later on in a relationship.

One of the most important warnings ever, when you are in a relationship as boyfriend/girlfriend, is your partner’s immediate family!

Well, you might think at first:” what’s this got to do with my girlfriend/boyfriend?”

It has a LOT to do with it! In fact, this is one of the most important factors in determining whether your relationship, whether as boyfriend/girlfriend, or as a married couple, will last. The reason is, again, in the beginning of a relationship, both of you will stand up to your respective families because you are in love. However, as years go by, love will not be as strong as it once was, most of the time, and as a result, if there are enough incompatibilities between you and your in-laws, problems will arise. This does not mean that you have to agree with your potential in-laws about everything, but generally, you have to make sure that there are some common grounds in thinking.

These problems get multiplied over the years, and interestingly enough, yet sadly, each one of you will eventually agree more with his/her family than with his/her partner. So make sure, from the beginning that you see eye to eye with you future in-laws about important matters, especially raising children. Remember that the minute you have a child, your whole perspective about life changes, and your child will become the most important thing in your life!
Differences, as to how to raise the children, could cause enough dissension so as to bring about a divorce.

If you do not pay attention to these “red flags”, you will regret it, as these incompatibilities may very well ruin your marriage.

Author Bio: The author is currently the webmaster of Product Reviews , Job Source and Myjobwatch.net

Category: Marriage
Keywords: Marriage,Relationships,Advice,Red Flags,Warnings,Divorce,Counseling,Therapy