Should the Mother of the Bride Be Her Mom-of-Honor?

Many brides consider their mothers to be their best friends. When it comes time to pick out a wedding party, asking your mother to be one of your attendants may seem like a natural choice. These are the ins and outs of having the mother of the bride be her “mom-of-honor”.

Without a doubt, being asked to be the maid or matron of honor in a wedding is a major compliment. After all, it is the bride’s way of saying that you are one of the most special and trusted people in her life. If the bride’s mom is the woman with whom she has the strongest bond, she may well wish to elevate her role in the wedding ceremony from simply mother of the bride to “mom-of-honor”.

Having a mom-of-honor tends to work very well when the wedding party is small. If the bride has only one person standing up with her, it is lovely for it to be her mom. In fact, while having one’s mother as the chief honor attendant is fairly rare, it is actually rather common for the groom to choose his father as the best man. When your mom is the only honor attendant, it makes things simple. She can select any dress she likes, pick out sophisticated bridesmaid jewelry, and choose between a bouquet and a corsage.

However, if you plan on having a large group of bridesmaids, it can be a little awkward to have your mother double as the maid of honor. This is not to say that you should not do it; just be sure to think through the logistics carefully beforehand. If your idea of the role of the wedding party is essentially to show up and look pretty for the ceremony, there should be no problem with having your mother in the group. On the other hand, brides who picture their engagement as including a bachelorette weekend in Vegas and a couple of last wild girls’ nights out might feel a bit funny about having their mothers along for the ride. Certainly, you could exclude her from events which are geared towards your contemporaries, but generally speaking, any wedding-related event should include your whole bridal party (well, except for the flower girl). Just be certain that you would be comfortable either omitting these types of events or having them without a maid of honor present.

When the bride’s mother is the matron of honor, she should coordinate with the other bridesmaids, but still dress appropriately for her age and important status. It actually is not so hard to pull this off gracefully, because even when all the bridesmaids wear the same dress, it is quite common to have the maid of honor dress in a way that distinguishes her key role. Select a dress for your mother in the same color and fabric as the younger ladies, but allow her to select a style that is comfortable for her. Perhaps your mom-of-honor would be happier in a portrait neckline dress when the other bridesmaids are wearing spaghetti straps. Or add a tailored shrug to a floor length strapless dress to make your mom feel both elegant and comfortable. As for the bridesmaid jewelry gifts, it is customary to give the honor attendant something more elaborate than the rest of the group, so don’t worry about matching the gift for your mom to those of the other bridesmaids. Simply pick out something that you know she will like.

Although most brides choose to have someone close in age as their maid of honor, it is absolutely acceptable to choose your mother for this special role. When mother and daughter have a very close friendship, there is no one better to stand alongside the bride on her special day.

Author Bio: Bridget Mora writes for Silverland Jewelry about wedding planning, relationships, and style. At http://www.silverlandjewelry.com/, we handcraft a fabulous array of bridesmaid jewelry for every style and taste.

Category: Marriage
Keywords: bridesmaid jewelry, mother of the bride, mother of the bride jewelry, maid of honor, mom of honor,

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